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It was a bad one alright. It was a doozie. It was La catastrophe. We declared my husband's birthday "The Worst Birthday Ever".
It started with his elation over the 3 day Labor Day celebration. For once, the weather forecast predicted rain - heavenly drops of relieving rain! That meant temps in the low '90's. That's sweater weather around these southern counties.
Three-day weekend. Cooler temps. This was going to be IT. Patrick was going to dismember his (new) car and situate a thumping sound system that would vibrate with a click. My husband is mechanically-minded thru and thru. This was to be like Christmas and birthday - all good and wonderful times that make one stupendously blithe.
Did he do it? Yep.
And... Nope.
There were wires everywhere. Teeny tiny wires that wrap hither and thither were everywhere. He was excited and enthusiastic...hopeful and passionate.
First the lack of rain was a shame; thus, no breezes could be gained.
Rain clouds reversed direction and skittered around Houston like a woman holding her skirts up, running through puddles in frightened disaffection.
As he expended a stream of sweat, I siphoned a unremitting flow of sugary lime-flavored water to steady it.
(my husband doesn't drink plain water...ew...says he.)
At half past five, he declared that the sound system was wired and alive!
Oh the joy! Oh the triumph over all things mechanically contrived!
When the key was turned to ignite the fire... the situation suddenly and abruptly grew quite dire.
The look on his face was of sheer panic and horror..
{...I'm so sorry honey...but...it was comical...sorta}.
If I were to characterize it, this is how I would describe it - like a child, who has made it all the way to the center of the tootsie roll pop with a smile...to discover, in a scene now turned quite droll, that there is no tootsie roll.
He poked. He prodded. He begged. He cried (o.k., he didn't cry it was just all that sweat). There was nothing I could do but look helplessly on and listen earnestly for a little bit of gas to detonate a little bit of spark with a little wisp of air so that engine would start!
He clasped head in hands with anguish, he concluded with perturbation that he was a disgrace to civilization!
So...what does a food blogger do when facing such indignation?
Go inside to make a Boston Creme Pie and hope for salvation!
Trouble, in its persnickety guise, stalked me right into the kitchen only to unleash what was certainly not contrition .
That darn cake. It was a fright. Nothing came out right. The chocolate ganache was too thin and trite. The cakes didn't rise to heights of beauty; nary a contest could they win and would only receive a wry grin. The custard filling was delicious but not quite the creaminess that would describe it as beautitious.
Now it would really be the worst birthday ever.
The dreaded tow truck was summoned. Someone's head swung down as low as it could go. The baby {I mean...car} is now at the hospital. Doctors are repairing the tiny wire, nicked with the drill, thus not producing any fire.
The birthday boy {I mean...man} enjoyed his cake as consolation. I sat there sulking; looking over my culinary creation with definite consternation.
No tunes were thumping. Despair hung thickly in the air. Another recipe must be found. Oh, this household looked like nothing but one big frown.
Boston Creme Pie for The Worst Birthday Ever
(adapted from the Martha Stewart website)
Ingredients:
2 tablespoons unsalted butter, plus more for pan
1 1/4 cups sugar, plus more for pan
1 1/4 cups sifted cake flour (not self-rising)
1 1/4 teaspoons baking powder
3/4 teaspoon salt
2 large eggs
2 large egg yolks
3/4 cup whole milk
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
7 tablespoons heavy cream
3 ounces best-quality semisweet chocolate, coarsely chopped
Pastry Cream Filling for Boston Cream Pie Pastry Cream Filling for Boston Cream Pie
Directions
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Make the cake: Lightly butter a 9-by-2-inch round cake pan, and line with parchment paper. Don't forget to line the bottom too. Butter parchment, and sprinkle with sugar (Snippet's Notes: I sprinkled it with sugar but I didn't care for the slight crunch on the cake) , tapping out excess; set aside.
In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt; set aside. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, whisk eggs and egg yolks on medium speed for 1 minute. Gradually add sugar, and continue beating until light and fluffy, about 3 minutes.
Meanwhile, heat milk and butter until hot in a small saucepan over medium heat; being careful not to boil the milk. Remove from heat, and stir in vanilla. With mixer still running, slowly add hot milk to egg mixture. Gradually add flour mixture, 1/4 cup at a time, mixing until incorporated. Transfer to prepared pan.
Bake until cake is golden brown and a tester inserted into the center comes out clean, 35 to 40 minutes. Transfer to a wire rack, and cool for 15 minutes. Remove from pan, leaving the cake bottom-side up. Let cool completely. (Snippet's Notes: my cakes came out rather flat. Until I try the recipe again, I can't recommend this cake recipe very highly)
Make the glaze: In a small saucepan over medium heat, bring heavy cream to a boil. Place chocolate in a medium bowl, and pour cream over chocolate, stirring until chocolate is melted and well combined. (Snippet's Notes: Mine was too thin. I ended up adding more chocolate to get the desired consistency) Set aside to cool slightly, about 10 minutes.
To assemble cake: Remove pastry cream from refrigerator. Beat with a stiff whisk until cream is smooth. Split cake in two even layers; spread bottom half with the pastry cream filling. Top with remaining layer. Pour glaze over center of cake, allowing it to spread, covering top and dripping down the sides. Chill cake for 20 minutes before serving.